I'm Lance's Dragon

suggested by anonymous

May I have your attention please!
May I have your attention please!
Will Lance's Dragonite please stand up?
I repeat, will Lance's Dragonite please stand up?
We’re gonna have a problem here...

Y’all act like you've never seen a tough poké before;
Jaws all on the floor, watching your team faint as you come through the door.
You send out anything, I'll have it beaten before
It's got a chance to use a single attack on me.
All the trainers say "Oh, wait, no way, you're kidding...
He didn't just beat my Rare-Candied Mewtwo, did he?"
And Mewtwo says.............not a whole lot,
'Cause, sure enough, it can't take what I've got!
Grim-faced Gyms look at us pretty dim:
"Look at that Lance and his Dragon, I'm sick of him, look at him
Walkin' around, braggin' 'bout you-know-what:
He just beat who-knows-who..." "Yeah, but he's so strong, though!"
Yeah, I probably got some reason to wind up conceited,
But no worse than the little ones Prof. Oak has treated.
Those newbies all get something small and level-five,
And think they're gonna wind up the best trainers alive!
"To catch 'em is your test, to train 'em is your quest,
And if you're lucky, you might just turn out to be the best!"
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids,
And expect them not to know what a challenge the League is.
But of course, they're gonna realize what they're in for by the time they get badge Eight;
They watch the televised matches, don't they?
They'll know the power we play with; the kind they gotta stay with
To get the victory they'll want to come away with.
But if they can build the kind of strength that we melee with,
They won't be satisfied until they've gotten us to play with.
And so we're challenged again, here on the Indigo,
Beatin' those who'd overthrow; every time they come, we go:

I'm Lance's Dragon,
Yes, I'm the real Dragon;
All you look-alike Dragons are just Ditto braggin',
So won't the real Lance's Dragon please stand up?
Please stand up? Please stand up?

"All the rest of the Elite Four know they're not perfect."
Well Lance is, 'cause he's the top wiz in this biz.
You think I care if Agatha loses?
I'm still gonna crush whatever pokémon the challenger chooses!
"Lance, I'm gonna win! My Ice-types have you beat!"
Oh no, I'm so scared! Articuno! I'm dead meat!
Let's see, what should I use...Blizzard? Fire Blast? Thunder?
They're all gonna put your precious "God of Ice" under!
The pokémon doesn't exist that can defeat me.
If you don't have my power, you've no chance to beat me!
But lately, trainers often take that the wrong way,
And assume that with a Ditto they'll be winning the day!
That stupid pink blob with no skill of its own
Is the big thing among those after Lance's throne!
Watching their one-foot pokémon grow to a seven-three,
Bet that boosts their confidence against me.
Now there's a million of 'em just like me, who brag like me,
Can melt a rock to slag like me,
Look like me, know all the killer moves like me;
It just might be the next best thing, but not quite me!

'Cause I'm Lance's Dragon,
Yes, I'm the real Dragon;
All you look-alike Dragons are just Ditto braggin',
So won't the real Lance's Dragon please stand up?
Please stand up? Please stand up?

I'm Lance's Dragon,
Yes, I'm the real Dragon;
All you look-alike Dragons are just Ditto braggin',
So won't the real Lance's Dragon please stand up?
Please stand up? Please stand up?

I'm like a headtrip to battle with, 'cause your mind'll rattle with
All the special moves I dish out that leave you addled. With
Burn, paralysis or freeze attack, I'll knock your status off wack
And hang you out on the rack to curse your luck and my knack!
When I step into the arena to defend it,
I practically upend it, and you'll beg to end it,
'Cause nothing of yours can quite survive against ours,
And that goes for you who try to copy my powers.
It's funny, 'cause the folks who use Ditto must be hoping
That I don't know myself well enough to be coping.
I've learned so much about each technique, I could speak till next week,
And the chances of your Ditto are bleak;
So it's simply not enough to only copy my physique.
I'm still totally unbeatable, Lance is not unseatable,
And Indigo Plateau remains too tough to take,
No matter how much effort they make.
So will the real Lance's Dragon, please stand up
And raise two of those fingers on each hand up,
Then be proud to be top of your class, in total control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?

I'm Lance's Dragon,
Yes, I'm the real Dragon;
All you look-alike Dragons are just Ditto braggin',
So won't the real Lance's Dragon please stand up?
Please stand up? Please stand up?

[fadeout on repeating chorus]